6 Tips for Finding Happiness After Divorce
Almost half of marriages will end in divorce. Financial difficulty, lack of commitment, unhappiness, and poor work-life balance are all common causes of divorce. If you find yourself in the half of couples who divorce, you may need to learn how to adjust. These tips are here to help you find happiness after going through a divorce.
Be Aware of Milestones
Many divorcees claim that they were doing well until they hit a milestone, such as an anniversary or holiday. The first of these is often the most difficult, and being aware of and preparing for them ahead of time can help you avoid a surprise. Invite a friend to dinner or go check out a movie to stay busy on your anniversary date. Discuss these milestones with your counselor so you can devise a few techniques to get through the day. You can schedule your therapy appointment on these dates to truly explore your thoughts.
Practice Self-Care
Self-care is especially important when adjusting to a huge life change like divorce. Find what makes you happy and relax, whether weekly massages or some shopping therapy are your preferred activities. In the meantime, try focusing on good quality sleep and a healthy diet. Exercise can also be a good way to release anger or frustration that may come with a divorce. Try to allocate at least one hour per week to self-care. Sometimes, self-care may be an in-depth therapy session, and others, it may be as simple as a relaxing bubble bath.
Find New Traditions
Many couples who divorce may not grieve the actual loss of a relationship but, instead, the loss of the day-to-day traditions. Most couples and families create a routine, which may include coming home from work and enjoying a meal together. Nights may be about getting the kids ready for bed. Weekends can be even more difficult to navigate as you’re used to spending all your downtime with your spouse or family.
Replacing these traditions or routines helps you create new memories and allows you to enjoy a new sense of “normal.” Set your table differently than you did with your spouse. Splurge on new home decor that they wouldn’t have enjoyed, but you do. Give your living room and bedroom a fresh coat of paint in your favorite color. Replace your weekend memories with your spouse by trying out a new hobby or joining a meetup group.
Learn To Explore Your Feelings
Divorce can lead to feelings of anger, guilt, frustration, sadness, empathy, and regret. What’s even more surprising is that you may feel like you’re on a rollercoaster of emotions, quickly moving from one to the next or, sometimes, experiencing multiple of them at the same time. For many, it’s natural to avoid these feelings, but left unresolved, they can interfere with your other relationships. Exploring these feelings rather than pushing them aside is important.
If you’re hesitant to dive into these feelings or unsure where to start, working with a professional may be worth it. Therapists in SF help Bay Area, California, residents overcome the quickly fluctuating emotions that are common with a divorce.
With more digital therapy options than ever before, finding the time for counseling has never been easier.
Know When To Reach Out To Friends
It’s okay to rely on your friends when you need a little extra help. With almost 50% of couples divorcing, it’s likely that you have a friend or two who have gone through one in your circle of friends.
It may be worth considering a divorce group if you don’t have a friend or circle you trust. The great thing about joining a divorce support group is that everyone is going through something similar. You’ll be exposed to those working through feelings of divorce at different points of the transition. You may even walk away from the group with new lifelong friends.
Give Yourself Time
Divorce is a huge milestone that takes time to fully overcome. Even if you initiated the divorce or believed that it was the right decision, you may still grieve a time when the relationship was good. If you share children, you may feel lonely during holidays when other families are celebrating. As with anything, it takes time, and the good news is that – a large percentage of men and women eventually remarry.
It’s also important to note that adjusting to a divorce isn’t a one-way progression. You may find that you go many months feeling as if you have improved, only to go back to the beginning during a milestone. Give yourself extra time and care when this happens.
Approximately one in every two couples will divorce. Divorce can be incredibly difficult on each spouse, even when splitting is a mutual agreement. It’s important to focus on self-care throughout each step of the divorce. Your mental health and well-being will thank you for prioritizing therapy or self-care during your divorce proceeding.
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